Why "how am I feeling?" isn't always the right question, why resilience doesn't mean what you think it means, and how rituals can steady you.

Dr. Suzan Song is a Harvard- and Stanford-trained psychiatrist, humanitarian researcher, and adviser. For more than two decades, she has dedicated her work to building resilience in individuals and communities affected by adversity. She has a private practice in Washington D.C., is a professor of psychiatry at George Washington University, and is a sought-after speaker on the science of healing. Her new book is Why We Suffer and How We Heal: Using Narrative, Ritual, and Purpose to Flourish Through Life's Challenges.

In this episode we talk about:

How a violent attack on her father shaped her life's work
Why we recreate the painful situations we swore we'd avoid
Why chasing stability causes so much of our suffering
Three tools for hard times: narrative, ritual, and purpose
How to spot and rewrite the scripts running our lives
How people heal in countries with almost no therapists
Why validation has to come before asking someone to change
Why purpose is about being needed, not achieving more
Why she thinks we've gotten "resilience" all wrong

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When Life Falls Apart: How To Break Old Patterns, Rewrite Your Inner Scripts, and Find Purpose | Dr. Suzan Song

10% Happier with Dan Harris

When Life Falls Apart: How To Break Old Patterns, Rewrite Your Inner Scripts, and Find Purpose | Dr. Suzan Song