467. The psychology of the cab theory

The "Taxi Cab Theory" posits that men marry the person they happen to be dating when they reach a personal threshold for commitment, rather than choosing based on fated love. This concept, popularized by *Sex and the City*, suggests that timing and convenience drive marital decisions. Psychological frameworks like the commitment readiness theory and socio-emotional selectivity theory explain this pattern, noting that as individuals age, they prioritize stability over novelty. While this theory highlights the role of social clocks and life stages, it often ignores the necessity of mutual compatibility and active, ongoing choice. Being a "foster girlfriend"—the person who helps a partner grow before they settle down with someone else—is a painful but common experience. Ultimately, genuine commitment requires mutual excitement and shared future goals rather than merely being the person present when a partner's "light" turns on.