A marriage can end over a bag of granola, a full year before anyone says the word divorce.

James Sexton, a divorce lawyer for over two decades, sat down with Lewis and told the story of a client whose husband always quietly restocked her favorite granola. One day the bag ran out and he never noticed. She knew right then that it was over.

He calls marriage a technology that fails about 53% of the time, and says most couples put more thought into the wedding cake than into what they are signing. In his book If You're in My Office, It's Already Too Late: A Divorce Lawyer's Guide to Staying Together, he shares what works: send the hard email while the hurt is still small, and get a prenup even when you feel certain. He also explains why infidelity usually starts with lost connection long before anyone cheats.

The line I keep repeating to people: the opposite of love is indifference. And he still believes in marriage. He compares it to the lottery, where the prize is so good that it is worth buying a ticket.

You will finish this one wanting to do some small, kind thing for your partner tonight without asking for credit. If you care about relationships and honest communication, you will probably start a conversation you have been putting off.

How to Stay in Love

If You're In My Office, It's Already Too Late: A Divorce Lawyer's Guide to Staying Together

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James on YouTube

Better Call Sexton Podcast

In this episode, you’ll:

Rethink the prenup as a conversation about caring for each other, not a bet against your marriage
Understand the Go Without or Go Elsewhere dynamic behind infidelity, and why sharing desires openly protects your connection
Discover why James Sexton treats marriage as a technology, with trade-offs to understand before you sign up
Learn the Hit Send Now habit for voicing what bothers you while it's still small enough to fix
See how small, unaddressed disconnections erode a relationship long before anyone calls a divorce lawyer
Get the Yours, Mine and Ours approach to money, so financial stress stops turning into resentment

For more information go to https://lewishowes.com/1991

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A Divorce Lawyer on the Small Things That End Marriages | James Sexton

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A Divorce Lawyer on the Small Things That End Marriages | James Sexton