Tim O'Connor: What’s the best way for a parent to address a problem at school?

Navigating the transition from primary to secondary school requires parents to shift from constant oversight to fostering student independence. Auckland Grammar Headmaster Tim O’Connor emphasizes that excessive parental involvement—such as hovering at the school gate—undermines a teenager's growth and ability to navigate their environment. Instead, parents should maintain a vested interest by asking open-ended questions about the school day, ideally during car rides where shoulder-to-shoulder interaction reduces pressure. While schools welcome parental engagement regarding genuine concerns, parents must avoid becoming habitual complainants to maintain credibility. Furthermore, single-sex environments provide critical structure and belonging for young men, provided schools remain adaptable to modern challenges while upholding core values. Ultimately, the goal is to treat students with respect and hold them accountable, allowing them to develop self-reliance as they progress through their secondary education.