Why You Don’t Feel Loved (even when you are) - Sonja Lyubomirsky - #1115

Feeling loved is a fundamental human requirement for survival, rooted in our ancestral need for tribal connection. Happiness interventions, such as expressing gratitude or performing acts of kindness, prove effective primarily because they bridge the gap between people, fostering a sense of being known and valued. Many individuals struggle to feel loved not due to a lack of affection from others, but because they fail to internalize it, often due to poor self-esteem or a lack of genuine curiosity in their relationships. Building lasting connection requires a shift from seeking admiration to embracing vulnerability, practicing radical curiosity, and viewing others through a "multiplicity" lens that accounts for their full human complexity. Ultimately, sustaining happiness involves actively celebrating the successes of others and maintaining consistent, meaningful communication to counter the natural tendency toward hedonic adaptation.