How to feel more loved, with Harry Reis, PhD

Feeling loved is a distinct internal experience separate from the external actions of others, rooted in being truly understood and appreciated. Dr. Harry Reis, a professor of psychology and co-author of *How to Feel Loved*, explains that individuals often hinder their own sense of connection by curating idealized versions of themselves to gain admiration rather than genuine intimacy. To foster deeper bonds, one must shift behaviors toward "listening to learn," radical curiosity, and vulnerability. These mindsets trigger a reciprocal cycle of social interaction where showing sincere interest in a partner’s experience encourages them to respond in kind. While technology like AI chatbots can provide temporary relief from loneliness, they lack the authentic, reciprocal choice required for long-term emotional fulfillment, which remains essential for both mental and physical well-being.