Introduction

Focusmate changed my life. I started using it mid-2023 and have been a power user since 2023. Here are the high-level stats:

I've spent 2,456 hours on Focusmate.
I've met 1,447 people.
I have 10+ friends with whom I've spent between 30 and 300 hours.
I've met five of my Focusmate friends in person. I've had a Focusmate's family over for dinner, gone to a party with a Focusmate, and stayed at a Focusmate's apartment.
I met my best friend and many close friends through Focusmate.
I've become significantly more productive and intentional with my time.

Focusmate is a coworking website. For the length of 25, 50, or 75 minutes, you work in a 1-on-1 video call with a partner. Most people use the app to hold themselves accountable on work projects, and the body-doubling effect helps keep users on task. To get started, create an account [...]

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Outline:

(00:10) Introduction

(01:58) What's a third place

(03:02) Start conversations at the end of sessions

(03:07) Making conversation

(03:55) Starting conversations is scary and awkward

(05:12) Be proactive in making friends

(06:02) Curate your neighborhood

(06:05) Favorite and snooze aggressively

(07:00) Develop close friends

(07:56) Theres a message box

(08:24) Build a routine of using Focusmate

(08:29) Have a recurring schedule every week

(09:02) Stick with it for a few months

(09:26) Conclusion

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First published:
April 28th, 2025

Source:
https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/4FnBEELf7j5RWyHax/how-to-build-a-third-place-on-focusmate

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Narrated by TYPE III AUDIO.

“How to Build a Third Place on Focusmate” by Parker Conley

LessWrong (30+ Karma)

“How to Build a Third Place on Focusmate” by Parker Conley