Summary

In this episode, Andy talks with Steven T. Collis, a law professor and author of Habits of a Peacemaker: 10 Habits to Change Our Potentially Toxic Conversations into Healthy Dialogues.' They discuss the increasing polarization in society, and challenges in having healthy dialogues at work and in personal life. Steven introduces ten habits from his book aimed at transforming potentially toxic conversations into healthy dialogues.

The conversation covers topics such as the importance of intellectual humility, seeking real learning, assuming the best about others, and practical strategies for engaging in productive discourse. Steven also shares personal stories and scenarios to illustrate how these habits can be applied, including dealing with difficult family members and controlling emotions.

With all of today's political polarization and conflicts at work, this book is a must-read for aspiring leaders to help them at work and beyond.

Sound Bites

"My brother could pick a fight with a wall when he was growing up."
"It's not enough to simply stop; you have to replace it with something else."
"Being a peacemaker means having productive dialogues about hard topics."
"We use a lot of slogans in our society and a lot of catchphrases, and chief among them is diversity, equity, and inclusion."
"Could there be something else that's motivating this person besides my assumption that they're acting out of bad motives?"
"If you're just an argumentative jerk, you're probably never going to persuade anybody."
"It's easy to be judgmental of other people, but we know so little about each other and about what's happening in our lives."
"We have to actually put in extra effort to free ourselves from these echo chambers."

Chapters

00:00 Introduction
02:04 Start Of Interview
02:22 Steven's Background And Family Influence
05:34 Defining A Peacemaker
06:54 Navigating Potentially Toxic Work Conversation About Dei
10:14 Fights Into Treasure Hunts
12:48 How Technology, Social Media, And Dopamine Impact Dialogue
16:19 Seeking Real Learning And Avoiding Echo Chambers
20:44 Assuming The Best In Difficult Conversations
25:21 Handling Political Differences At Family Gatherings
28:25 Understanding Gaslighting
31:18 Applying Habits At Home
34:05 Wrap Up
34:27 Andy Comments After The Interview
38:32 Outtakes

Learn More

You can learn more about Steven and his books at StevenTCollis.com.

Prepare to Pass Your Project Management Certification Exam

We regularly help people just like you prepare and pass their PMP and CAPM certification exams. If you or someone you know is thinking about pursuing project management certification, contact us! We'd love to help you earn your credential. Learn more and enroll at i-leadonline.com/PMSeries.

Thank you for joining me for this episode of The People and Projects Podcast!

Talent Triangle: Power Skills

The following music was used for this episode:

Music: Ignotus by Agnese Valmaggia
License (CC BY 4.0): https://filmmusic.io/standard-license

Music: Synthiemania by Frank Schroeter
License (CC BY 4.0): https://filmmusic.io/standard-license

PPP 430 | How to Talk With a Stakeholder (or That Relative) You Don't Agree With--Without Starting a Fight, with Steven T. Collis

People and Projects Podcast: Project Management Podcast

PPP 430 | How to Talk With a Stakeholder (or That Relative) You Don't Agree With--Without Starting a Fight, with Steven T. Collis