In Session 324, Dr. Paulie Gavoni and Steve Ward join me to discuss what resilience actually looks like from a behavior science perspective — and why many well-intentioned adult responses can unintentionally teach avoidance instead of persistence.

We center our conversation around their book, S.H.I.T. Happens: Building Resilient Children in a Fragile World, which reframes resilience not as a personality trait or motivational slogan, but as a set of learnable repertoires shaped by the environments adults design

We talk about:

Why resilience is a behavioral repertoire, not a mindset or personality trait
The hidden ways adult anxiety shapes children's learning environments
How overprotection and pressure both undermine skill development
Designing "successful struggle" so kids contact reinforcement for effort
Everyday moments — homework, sports, emotional setbacks — as resilience practice
The adult's role as guide, not rescuer or drill sergeant
Teaching recovery instead of avoidance
Scaling challenges to build confidence and persistence
Why discomfort is information, not danger

This discussion emphasizes practical decision-making: how small changes in adult behavior can create conditions where children learn to try again, persist longer, and experience the satisfaction of overcoming something difficult.

Whether you're a practitioner, educator, or parent, this episode highlights how resilience is built through repeated opportunities to struggle safely — and why those opportunities matter more than we often realize.

Resources mentioned:

Paulie and Steve's book
Assent & Trauma Informed Care: A Call for Nuance in Behavior Analysis
Motivational Interviewing: Getting Educator Buy-In (course)
Adaptive Intelligence: The Evolution of Emotional Intelligence Through the Proven Power of Behavior Science
Paulie's other books
Kind Extinction: A Procedural Variation on Traditional Extinction
The Four Leadership Hats: Applying Behavioral Science to Leadership and Supervision (Session 321 with John Guercio)
The ACT Matrix: A New Approach to Building Psychological Flexibility Across Settings and Population
Session 313: Client Assent in Behavior Analysis: Balancing Autonomy and Clinical Progress (Ethics CE available)

Sponsor shoutouts

Resilience Is a Skill — Raising Capable Kids in a Fragile World: Session 324 with Paulie Gavoni and Steve Ward

The Behavioral Observations Podcast with Matt Cicoria