#1056 - Dr Paul Eastwick - Did Evolutionary Psychology Get Dating All Wrong? | Modern Wisdom

The podcast explores the science of relationships, contrasting evolutionary psychology perspectives with relationship science's emphasis on compatibility and attachment. Dr. Paul Eastwick challenges the notion of a competitive "mating market," arguing that initial attraction fades as people get to know each other, emphasizing that compatibility and shared experiences become more critical for long-term relationships. The conversation covers gender differences in mate preferences, with Dr. Eastwick suggesting that revealed preferences often differ from stated preferences, and that factors like ambition and earning potential are valued similarly by both men and women. They also discuss the role of vulnerability and support in building strong attachments, highlighting how shared experiences and microcultures contribute to relationship satisfaction.

Outlines

Part 1: Challenging Evolutionary Psychology

Part 2: Attraction, Satisfaction, and Social Dynamics

Part 3: Gender Differences and Preferences

Part 4: Dating Careers and Relationship Trajectories

Part 5: Attachment, Breakups, and Microcultures

Part 6: Long-term Bonds and Conclusions

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#1056 - Dr Paul Eastwick - Did Evolutionary Psychology Get Dating All Wrong?

Modern Wisdom

Part 1: Challenging Evolutionary Psychology

Challenging Evolutionary Psychology: The Mating Market and Relationship Science

The Fading Consensus of Attractiveness Over Time and Alternative Meeting Methods

The Impact of Modern Dating Environments on Egalitarian Mating

Mating as Hierarchy vs. Compatibility: Challenging Mate Value Matching

Part 2: Attraction, Satisfaction, and Social Dynamics

Attractiveness, Satisfaction, and Motivated Biases in Relationships

Self-Improvement vs. Social Networks: Alternative Avenues for Mating Success

The Widening Funnel: Attractiveness, Opportunity, and Evolutionary Perspectives

Resource Provisioning, Competence, and Compatibility in Mate Selection

Part 3: Gender Differences and Preferences

Gender Differences in Mate Preferences: Stated vs. Revealed Preferences

Education, Singledom, and the "Men Need to Up Their Game" Narrative

Stated vs. Revealed Preferences: Attractiveness, Vulnerability, and Relationship Happiness

Vulnerability, Reciprocal Altruism, and Evolving Preferences Over Time

Part 4: Dating Careers and Relationship Trajectories

Longitudinal Dating Careers: Dexterity, Taste, Timing, and Compatibility

Short-Term vs. Long-Term Mating: Challenging the Alpha Chad vs. Beta Dad Dichotomy

Signaling, Interpretation, and the Impact of Sexual Behavior on Relationship Trajectories

The Importance of Waiting, Relationship Science, and the Experience of Relationships

Part 5: Attachment, Breakups, and Microcultures

Attachment, Support, and the Psychological Destabilization of Breakups

Recovering from Breakups: Support, Narrative Construction, and Open Loops

Microcultures in Relationships: Shared History, Jokes, and Sustaining Bonds

Part 6: Long-term Bonds and Conclusions

Pro-Relationship Biases: Derogating Alternatives and Idealizing Partners

Human Mating Systems: Attachment, Serial Monogamy, and the Life Cycle of Relationships

Concluding Thoughts: Evolutionary Psychology, Relationship Science, and Data-Driven Perspectives

#1056 - Dr Paul Eastwick - Did Evolutionary Psychology Get Dating All Wrong?

Modern Wisdom

Part 1: Challenging Evolutionary Psychology

00:29Challenging Evolutionary Psychology: The Mating Market and Relationship Science

Challenging Evolutionary Psychology: The Mating Market and Relationship Science

05:06The Fading Consensus of Attractiveness Over Time and Alternative Meeting Methods

The Fading Consensus of Attractiveness Over Time and Alternative Meeting Methods

11:05The Impact of Modern Dating Environments on Egalitarian Mating

The Impact of Modern Dating Environments on Egalitarian Mating

15:28Mating as Hierarchy vs. Compatibility: Challenging Mate Value Matching

Mating as Hierarchy vs. Compatibility: Challenging Mate Value Matching

Part 2: Attraction, Satisfaction, and Social Dynamics

19:55Attractiveness, Satisfaction, and Motivated Biases in Relationships

Attractiveness, Satisfaction, and Motivated Biases in Relationships

25:01Self-Improvement vs. Social Networks: Alternative Avenues for Mating Success

Self-Improvement vs. Social Networks: Alternative Avenues for Mating Success

29:32The Widening Funnel: Attractiveness, Opportunity, and Evolutionary Perspectives

The Widening Funnel: Attractiveness, Opportunity, and Evolutionary Perspectives

32:12Resource Provisioning, Competence, and Compatibility in Mate Selection

Resource Provisioning, Competence, and Compatibility in Mate Selection

Part 3: Gender Differences and Preferences

37:58Gender Differences in Mate Preferences: Stated vs. Revealed Preferences

Gender Differences in Mate Preferences: Stated vs. Revealed Preferences

42:31Education, Singledom, and the "Men Need to Up Their Game" Narrative

Education, Singledom, and the "Men Need to Up Their Game" Narrative

47:23Stated vs. Revealed Preferences: Attractiveness, Vulnerability, and Relationship Happiness

Stated vs. Revealed Preferences: Attractiveness, Vulnerability, and Relationship Happiness

51:56Vulnerability, Reciprocal Altruism, and Evolving Preferences Over Time

Vulnerability, Reciprocal Altruism, and Evolving Preferences Over Time

Part 4: Dating Careers and Relationship Trajectories

55:21Longitudinal Dating Careers: Dexterity, Taste, Timing, and Compatibility

Longitudinal Dating Careers: Dexterity, Taste, Timing, and Compatibility

1:00:32Short-Term vs. Long-Term Mating: Challenging the Alpha Chad vs. Beta Dad Dichotomy

Short-Term vs. Long-Term Mating: Challenging the Alpha Chad vs. Beta Dad Dichotomy

1:05:53Signaling, Interpretation, and the Impact of Sexual Behavior on Relationship Trajectories

Signaling, Interpretation, and the Impact of Sexual Behavior on Relationship Trajectories

1:12:25The Importance of Waiting, Relationship Science, and the Experience of Relationships

The Importance of Waiting, Relationship Science, and the Experience of Relationships

Part 5: Attachment, Breakups, and Microcultures

1:17:26Attachment, Support, and the Psychological Destabilization of Breakups

Attachment, Support, and the Psychological Destabilization of Breakups

1:20:47Recovering from Breakups: Support, Narrative Construction, and Open Loops

Recovering from Breakups: Support, Narrative Construction, and Open Loops

1:25:24Microcultures in Relationships: Shared History, Jokes, and Sustaining Bonds

Microcultures in Relationships: Shared History, Jokes, and Sustaining Bonds

Part 6: Long-term Bonds and Conclusions

1:27:52Pro-Relationship Biases: Derogating Alternatives and Idealizing Partners

Pro-Relationship Biases: Derogating Alternatives and Idealizing Partners

1:30:31Human Mating Systems: Attachment, Serial Monogamy, and the Life Cycle of Relationships

Human Mating Systems: Attachment, Serial Monogamy, and the Life Cycle of Relationships

1:34:47Concluding Thoughts: Evolutionary Psychology, Relationship Science, and Data-Driven Perspectives

Concluding Thoughts: Evolutionary Psychology, Relationship Science, and Data-Driven Perspectives