What To Do When You Get Triggered

Getting triggered serves as a vital diagnostic tool for self-discovery because emotional reactivity only occurs when an external comment "rhymes" with a person's existing negative self-talk. This psychological friction arises from a lack of self-acceptance; for instance, a person only feels defensive about being called "incompetent" if they secretly harbor that fear and view it as an unacceptable flaw. By owning these shadow traits—such as being a "dick," a braggart, or judgmental—individuals can dissolve the internal resistance that ironically perpetuates those very behaviors. A poignant example involves a mother whose defensive anger regarding her parenting stemmed from her own deep-seated shame, which hindered her ability to improve. Ultimately, embracing one's imperfections and admitting to universal human flaws leads to emotional freedom, transforming once-painful triggers into exciting opportunities to identify and integrate unloved parts of the self.